


Little Plaid Cap

by Anonymous



Series: Holmes Brothers Grimm [1]
Category: Sherlock Holmes & Related Fandoms
Genre: Coding, Fairytale Remix
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-11-20
Updated: 2017-11-20
Packaged: 2019-02-04 13:24:17
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,424
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12771984
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/
Summary: A fusion of Little Red Cap (Little Red Riding Hood) and various Sherlock Holmes stories, with the focus on the original Grimm fairytale. There is also a companion piece which has Holmes (Dying Detective) as the focus and less Grimm.One day, Little Plaid Cap's brother said, “Look, Little Plaid Cap, here is a piece of cake and a bottle of wine and some secret plans for a submarine. Take them to Grandmother. She is sick and weak due to Too Much Art in the Blood. No one will visit her secluded little cottage, so it will be an excellent place to hide the plans, and perhaps the cake and wine will make her feel better.





	Little Plaid Cap

ONCE there was a dear, quite tall man whom everyone at Scotland Yard admired and wanted to shake hands with, though it was his grandmother who truly loved him most of all. There was nothing she would not give him. She had even made him a little plaid deerstalker cap, which was so becoming on him that the mainstream media never represented him wearing anything else-- and that was why everyone called him Little Plaid Cap. 

One day, Little Plaid Cap's brother said, “Look, Little Plaid Cap, here is a piece of cake and a bottle of wine and some secret plans for a submarine. Take them to Grandmother. She is sick and weak due to Too Much Art in the Blood. No one will visit her secluded little cottage, so it will be an excellent place to hide the plans, and perhaps the cake and wine will make her feel better. You’d better start now before the path gets too saturated with sticky yellow fog. Walk properly, like a good, dear boy, and don’t leave the path or you will fall down and break the bottle and there won’t be anything for Grandmother-- and we all know how the French love their wine. And when you get to her house, don’t forget to say 'good morning', and don’t go looking in all the corners deducing things because that is quite rude.” 

Normally, Little Plaid Cap would lure his companion, a soldier who had returned from the wars, away from either his workplace or his latest wife for a journey such as this, but his brother had requested expediency and it was but a short trip. He would travel alone.

"I will take great care," Little Plaid Cap assured his brother. 

His grandmother lived in the wood, half an hour's hansom ride from the village. No sooner had Little Plaid Cap set foot on the forest path than he met a man with thick sideburns and beady eyes he immediately recognised as the rogue ruffian known only as The Wolf. Little Plaid Cap knew what a wicked beast he was, but he wasn't afraid of him. 

"Good morning, Little Plaid Cap," said he. 

"Thank you kindly, Wolf." 

"Where are you going so early, Little Plaid Cap?" 

"To my grandmother's." 

"And what's that you've got under your Inverness cape?" 

"Cake and wine. My brother's housekeeper baked yesterday, so Grandmother, who is sick and weak, shall have something nice to make her feel better." 

"Where does your grandmother live, Little Plaid Cap?" 

"In St John's Wood, fifteen or twenty minutes' ride from here, under the three large, copper-coloured beech trees. There are moss rose bushes just below. You must know the place."

_How overconfident and brazen he is!_ thought The Wolf. _Why, to rid myself of him would be a far more worthy challenge than merely stealing those plans. Maybe, if I'm clever enough, I can get them both._

So, after walking along the path for a short while beside Little Plaid Cap, he said, "Little Plaid Cap, open your eyes. What lovely flowers! Why don't you look around you? Or are you, much like an automaton, incapable of enjoying all the pleasure which nature bestows? I don't believe you even hear how sweetly the birds are singing. It's so delightful out here in the wood, yet you trudge as solemnly as if you were going to the dentist." In this way, The Wolf hoped to distract Little Plaid Cap, and therefore do away with him.

Little Plaid Cap looked up, and saw the sunbeams dancing this way and that between the trees and the beautiful flowers all around him, pausing briefly to admire the fragrant lilac bushes, the violets, hyacinths and wild carnations strewn about the forest floor (for despite his singular focus, he was certainly quite capable of appreciating all forms of beauty afforded by Divine Providence). He smiled and said, "Grandmother will be pleased if I bring her a bunch of nice fresh flowers. It's so early now that I am certain to be there in plenty of time." Once he had picked one, he exclaimed that surely there must be a more beautiful one farther on, and so he went deeper and deeper into the wood and The Wolf soon lost sight of him. 

The Wolf, foiled in his nefarious scheme to lead our beloved protagonist astray, eviscerate him, and steal the plans, decided his best course of action was to head straight to Grandmother's house. He knocked at the door. 

"Who's there?" 

"Little Plaid Cap, bringing cake and wine. Open the door." 

"Just raise the latch," cried the grandmother, "I'm too weak to get out of bed." 

The Wolf raised the latch and the door swung open. Without saying a single word, he went straight to Grandmother's bed and bound her from head to toe and tossed her in an airing cupboard. He then threw open her closet to reveal a stunning array of dressing gowns, one in every colour of the rainbow. He chose a mouse-coloured one, which he donned along with her nightcap, and lay down in the bed. He settled under the duvet and drew the curtains, for the old woman had a sketchpad near her nightstand -- you will recall that she was an artist!

Meanwhile, Little Plaid Cap had been running about picking flowers, and when he had as many as he could carry and was certain the Wolf was nowhere to be seen, he started off again to Grandmother's. When he arrived, he was surprised to find the front door open, and was struck with a creeping, shrinking sensation as he stepped into the house. 

"Halloa!" he called out, but there was no answer. 

Then he went up to the bed and drew the curtains as well (though truly it was more like a quick sketch, since he was anxious). His grandmother had the cap pulled far down over her face, and clearly was not his grandmother at all, for The Wolf was hardly a master of disguise. And this was Little Plaid Cap's own grandmother, after all. He knew her pretty well. Still, best to play along for the time being.

"Oh, Grandmother, what big ears you have!"

"The better to hear you with."

"Oh, Grandmother, what big eyes you have!"

"The better to see you with."

"Oh, Grandmother, what big hands you have!"

"The better to grab you with!"

And no sooner had The Wolf spoken than he bounded off the bed and grabbed Little Plaid Cap. When The Wolf had tied him up and thrown him into the cupboard as well, he began to ransack the basket, searching for the plans. That was precisely when Little Plaid Cap's companion arrived. 

"Old boy!" Little Plaid Cap said under his breath upon hearing the scuffle, "You've found me after all! I was worried it would be a long time. I should have known never to underestimate you." He easily slipped free of his own bonds and quietly untied his grandmother, making sure she was in good health.

The soldier leveled his service revolver and was just about to fire when it occurred to him that The Wolf might have taken both his companion and his grandmother elsewhere, and he needed to assure their safety, first and foremost. In exchange for his life, The Wolf revealed their hiding place. They were both alive and well, though the old woman could barely breathe, so dark and oppressive it had been inside the hiding place, whilst Little Plaid Cap had patiently awaited the moment his soldier would free him.

The soldier (who also happened to be a doctor) checked Little Plaid Cap's bare wrists, gently running his hands over the fading red marks on his skin. After permitting the soldier a moment to reassure himself all was well, Little Plaid Cap ran outside and brought back great stones. Together, they set up a contraption by which the heavy stones pinned The Wolf to the side of a nearby bridge so that his legs would no longer carry him, where he would be forced to await the arrival of the authorities.

All three were happy; the grandmother ate of the cake and drank of the wine and had a bit of restorative brandy as well, and soon felt much better; and as for Little Plaid Cap, he said to himself, _Never again will I leave without my faithful companion._ The flowers made Grandmother sneeze, so he presented them to the soldier, who liked them very much indeed.

The End


End file.
